Newly Single Dating Blog

The companion site to newlysingledating.co.uk

Newly Single Dating Blog - The companion site to newlysingledating.co.uk

Category Archives: Newly Single Dating

Would you go on a blind date on Valentines day?

Would you go on a blind date on Valentines day?

Vision Direct Poll Reveals Nation’s Dating Habits
● 42 per cent of Brits wouldn’t be fussed going on a first date on Valentine’s Day
● One in eight Brits has lied to a blind date about their real looks
● Mobile phone use biggest turn-off during first dates according to 72 per cent of respondents
● Pictures of semi- naked “Lads on Tour/Girls’ Holiday in Dubai” deemed biggest dating app turn-offs
● 53% per cent still admit to not having seen the Ask For Angela posters or knowing what it means

According to new figures released today on the nation’s dating habits, almost half of the population (42%), wouldn’t mind going out with someone for the first time on Valentine’s Day. Only one in ten admitted it was off the books, whilst almost one in five (19%) would wait at least five dates before feeling it was appropriate to celebrate the most romantic day of the year with their other half.
The poll of 2,465 respondents conducted by leading contact lens retailer Vision Direct, also revealed our nation’s somewhat deceitful approach to dating. When asked if they had ever told a blind date they looked different so they could leave the site unseen in case their date was not up to standards, one in eight (12%) admitted to having done it at least once.
Smile and eyes are most attractive features

Asked about what they found most attractive in a person, Brits chose a person’s smile (38%), followed closely by the eyes (37%) and voice (5%). When it comes to eyes, it seems that blue is the most attractive colour, winning over a larger pool of respondents (42%) compared to the runners up brown (31%) and green (18%). Surprisingly, one in twenty (5.3%) respondents confessed they’re most attracted to eyes with different colours.

It’s all about the eye for detail
This may be the reason why more than one in ten respondents (11%) admitted to wearing coloured contact lenses to a first date, without revealing the true colour of their eyes. While most of these (47%) came clean within a couple of days, a quarter (26%) have never managed to reveal their true colour for fear of disappointing their date.
Ashley Mealor, Chief Marketing Officer at Vision Direct, said: “It was interesting for us to see how mainstream coloured contacts had become, to the point of customers wearing them on a routine basis. I think it’s important for people to be able to alter their appearance in a non-invasive way, especially if this brings benefits such as a boost in self-esteem and confidence”.
“Lads on Tour” and “Girls’ Holiday in Dubai” pictures get the left swipe

When it comes to dating apps, it seems the top nuisance for the 2,465 respondents were profiles with the majority of pictures in semi-naked “Lads on Tour” and “Girls’ Holiday in Dubai” scenes (13%), followed by people wearing sunglasses in almost every picture (10%). In terms of the successive face-to-face part, it seems the biggest turn-off by far is people constantly being on their phones (72%), followed by showing up with a friend (12%), mentioning an ex (9%) and being called pet names (6%) such as babe, love and darling.
“Ask for Angela” if you’re feeling in an unsafe situation
Finally, one thing worth remembering when going out on a date, especially if it’s taking the wrong turn is to “Ask for Angela”. More than half of respondents (53%) still admit to not having seen it advertised or knowing what it means.

The Dating minefield,

The Dating minefield,

In this new era of openness and exposure, it can sometimes be difficult for everyday men to entertain ladies whilst fearful of breaking any boundaries.

1. Be yourself – this may seem like an obvious thing to say, but the world of dating is a political minefield and it can be difficult to know what you can and cannot say. But, most importantly, be you. Not a fearful, politically correct and apologetic you, or a rebellious ball-of-adolescent ignorance kind of guy, but a person that’s true to you beyond any act. The good man in you will attract a good woman.

2. Be clear about your intentions – make sure that it’s obvious what your intentions are from the getgo. Going into a date as a friend will leave you in the one place that men dread: The Friend Zone. Show yourself as a sexual, self-aware, vulnerable being and you will be on the path to success.

3. Don’t play games – kiss-chase belongs on the playground and not in the adult dating world. If you are dating someone, they don’t want to be playing dress-up and guess who, so be truthful about how you feel, who you are, what you want, your fears, fantasies and everything in between.

4. Ask questions – and just as important; listen. Remember that you’re engaging with another person, so show some genuine curiosity and interest in finding common ground. Too many men get so obsessed with putting on a good show and flaunting their ego that there’s no space left for genuine connection, exploration and fun!

5. Be genuine – in the post #MeToo world, being brave and being open has become more acceptable. More than anything, though, we are all individuals with our own stories. Be sure to share your story from your heart and show some compassion and emotion. Show up and share your heart

Happy online dating and meeting up with your prospective dates.
www.newlysingledating.co.uk

When you search and find Love online, make sure that your future partner isn’t manipulative or a narcissist.

When you search and find Love online, make sure that your future partner isn’t manipulative or a narcissist.

Make sure that……

1. You are not constantly undermined –
making fun of each other is the sign of a healthy relationship, but no one wants to constantly be the butt of the joke. If your partner is constantly mocking you and undermining you in public, it could be a sign that they are trying to manipulate your self-esteem and make you feel worthless – something that could increase their control over you in the future.

2. Gaslighting –
gaslighting refers to creating self-doubt and confusion in someone, in order to manipulate and control them. For example, if you partner has done something to upset you and then denies that they did it and calls you ‘crazy’ for thinking they did, they may be gaslighting you into believing hat you are the problem and that you are making up drama and causing problems.

3. It’s never their fault –
being a good partner means you’re able to admit your mistakes and hold your hands up when you are wrong. However, if your partner is trying to manipulate you, they will often place the blame elsewhere and make everything your fault. Keep an eye out for this trait and make sure you don’t fall victim to it.

4. You are always on call –
it’s important to be there for your partner, but you don’t want them to take advantage of you. While you want your partner to be safe, you are not an errand boy or a cab driver, so you shouldn’t need to be constantly on call. It’s important that your relationship doesn’t become a job – your partner should be your equal, not your boss.

5. They constantly let you down –
whether you have just started seeing each other or you are in a long-term relationship, it’s always important to know where you stand. If your partner isn’t showing signs of commitment and not being truthful, it could be a sign of manipulation and mind games. Make sure that you know where you stand and how committed they are to your relationship.

Good luck with the dating.
Find love again at
www.newlysingledating.com

Puppy love: dogs really are a man’s (and woman’s) best friend

Puppy love: dogs really are a man’s (and woman’s) best friend

• Dogs can increase your chances of finding love by 117%.
• Having a dog in your profile photo leads to 69% more matches for women.
• Men can see their inbound messages rise by 75% by having a dog in their photo.

A dog really is a man’s or woman’s best friend when it comes to finding love, according to a new study.

Singletons can increase their chances of finding their perfect match by 117% if they use their pet dog to help them do it

Singletons found that their pet dogs played a major role in helping them to find potential suitors,
One girl says…
“I found that it was a good conversation starter, particularly for men who had dogs themselves, as it instantly gives you some common ground. I’ve already been on a date with a fellow dog owner so watch this space!”
One man says…
” One of the most frequent messages I received was that having a dog makes a man seem more approachable and easier to relate to”

You could try this at
www.newlysingledating.co.uk

The rules of dating for the post ‘#metoo’ male

The rules of dating for the post ‘#metoo’ male
with thanks to Lara Asprey

If you’re a single man you’re probably a little bit perplexed by ‘#MeToo’.
It’s not that you don’t support women let’s make that clear. In fact, you think it’s great that so many women have felt empowered enough to come out and stand up collectively against sexual predators who were exploiting their positions of power. I mean times change right, it’s not 1970 and men simply can’t behave like misogynist pigs anymore. You’re on board with the fact that our culture must evolve to make women more equal and to have a voice…
And what a voice it’s been this year. Powerful, constant and humbling.
But you’re a modern man and you probably don’t really associate yourself with these predatory men right? Perhaps you deem them to be the vast minority and you would never dream of overstepping the mark with someone. But where is the ‘mark’ these days? Hasn’t it become more difficult to decipher?
Most men have gone about their days, head down, listening and supportive, keeping an ear out for latest developments with regards ‘#metoo’ with a mild curiosity and internal applause for the brave women who have spoken out. However, for SINGLE men the dating game just got a hell of a lot harder.
So what are the new rules of dating for the post ‘#metoo’ male? What are you meant to do now? Will being flirtatious be misconstrued as harassment? Will an advance be deemed as predatory? Should you wine and dine a woman in the same way now or will she take offence? How will you really know what constitutes as ‘consent’?
So guys, fear not, I am going to lay it out for you in plain black and white so there’s no confusion.
1. Recognise the difference between being a nice guy and a ‘nice guy’
Women are becoming very tuned into the difference between what a guy says and what a guy does. They have ‘creepdar’ on their minds when sussing out a potential match so actions really do speak louder than words more than ever at the moment. If you keep telling a girl you’re a ‘nice guy’ but then don’t follow up with corresponding behaviour then it’s unlikely you will deemed as genuine. For example, compliment her smile not her lips. Don’t tell her she’s the most beautiful woman and then check out other women in her company. If you say you want to see her again when she’s in your presence, but then don’t follow up she’s going to get mixed messages from you and you’ll probably think you’re playing the field. All of this counts in the context of ‘metoo’ as women are now much more suspicious of men and have their guard up when it comes to inconsistent behaviour.
2. Don’t expect to be rewarded for good behaviour
Just because you buy a woman dinner does not mean she owes you anything! You all know this but so many forget! Let’s say you have really liked a girl for ages and have been on your best behaviour trying to impress her and you’re hoping to progress the relationship. Well, I have news for you boys, as you simply aren’t the ones to decide the pace at which to progress things anymore. Just because you’re ready, doesn’t mean she is too, so don’t expect anything in return for your nice endeavours. You should be treating her nicely by default not because you want to get something out of the relationship.
3. Take no for an answer
This one is important. You are allowed to ask a woman out but only once and if she says no that’s it. You drop it there like a gracious gentleman and do not continue to persevere. I know many men love the thrill of a chase but you really need to move with the times. If she’s keen enough she will show signs of reciprocation so there’s no need to keep asking. The same can be said whilst dating someone, if they say no to advances either flirtatiously or sexually. That’s it, you go no further.
4. Understand the difference between harassment and flirting
Sometimes what is deemed by one to be harmless flirting can be misconstrued as sexual harassment and so it’s important to clarify the difference. Harassment is basically unwanted behaviour of a sexual nature which makes someone feel offended, violated, or humiliated. The key words here when it comes to harassment are that it is behaviour that is unwanted and imposed. Flirtation on the other hand, isn’t about imposing anything on anyone but moreover, a chance to gauge if someone is interested in you. You can be charming and coy without imposing yourself or your position on them. So flirt away, just make sure it’s reciprocated!
5. Recognise and read her body language
Body language is holy grail for working out consent. Is she turning her body towards you when she’s talking to you? Is her demeanour relaxed and open in your presence? Is she engaging in eye contact and smiling? It’s common sense, but if she’s turning away from you and not showing any signs that she wants to talk to you then take it for what it is. If someone moves away from you physically it’s means they have no intention of getting closer to you romantically.
6. Don’t stop being romantic
Many guys are so fearful of stepping out of line with a woman at the moment that they simply aren’t walking it. You’re bound to be a little more apprehensive in the wake of ‘metoo’ but don’t let that be an excuse to become less romantic. Women don’t assume all men to be the enemy here, they are merely standing up against those men who have abused their positions of power. Women still want to be romanced! You should still feel free to compliment a woman without it being deemed as harassment.

Ultimately when it comes down to it, ‘metoo’ is all about showing respect. Repect for her principles, respect for her boundaries and respect for her consent. There’s no reason to fear approaching or flirting with someone but it’s about how you handle it. If you are polite, gracious and gentlemanly it will stand you in very good stead.